


>Begin: [Again]

by celestialriptide



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Angst, Canon Compliant, Fix-It, Galra Keith (Voltron), Hurt, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Post S8, Post-Canon Fix-It, i'll just add more tags later theres not much yet
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-04-14
Updated: 2019-04-14
Packaged: 2020-01-13 03:52:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,436
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18460937
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/celestialriptide/pseuds/celestialriptide
Summary: Sometimes things happen that we have no control of. Sometimes, no matter how many different scenarios you plan for, you won't be prepared for what actually happens. Sometimes you love a man for years, and just when you think things are going to start going the way they should have already, he's getting married to someone else.If there's one thing that Keith has learned, now, it's that sometimes the only thing you can do is pick yourself up and begin again.





	>Begin: [Again]

**Author's Note:**

> This is un-beta'd. I'm just (finally) trying to work through my feelings regarding that ending we were left with.  
> [I spent an hour tryna link this on the goddamn lyrics but it wont let me so here.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YSWIfX_MNCY)
> 
>   
> _Whether near or far_  
>  _I am always yours_  
>  _Any change in time_  
>  _We are young again_  
>  ~  
>  _In these coming years_  
>  _Many things will change_  
>  _But the way I feel_  
>  _Will remain the same_  
> 

The first year after was chaotic for all of them, but Keith feels that it may have been the most chaotic for himself. While the others were out rediscovering their roles on Earth, he was busy with the Blade. Daibazaal was back, and Zarkon was gone. Their was no place in the universe for the role the Galra had played, and it was time for major change and reform. There was a lot of work to be done, rehabilitating citizens and reworking the military into what would, hopefully, become a working government once again. Keith was in the middle of it all, more than he ever imagined he would be. So, while his friends were at home with their families, he was with his _rebuilding_ a home they never quite imagined they'd get to see. It was exhilarating, he couldn't lie. He loved the work he was doing, and each step forward the Galra took, the more proud of them he became. He told Shiro as much every time they spoke. 

 

They spoke frequently. 

 

For a while. 

 

Looking back, maybe he should have known something was changing. What started as daily calls turned to every other day, to once a week, every other week. 

 

There was so much to do, though, that Keith rarely noticed the time slipping by him. Being out in space, endlessly surrounded by darkness as they hunted down and pulled back previous-warlord after warlord...it was sometimes hard to keep track of how much time was passing. Usually, he relied on Shiro's calls, as regular as they were, to keep track for him. 

 

Monthly. 

 

He should have known. He should have knownheshouldhaveknowheshouldhaveknownheshouldhave-

 

The Galra citizens loved him. They followed him easily. When he parked himself on Daibazaal and worked alongside them, outlining a new way of life and building their cities from the ground up with them, they welcomed him with open arms. He'd never, particularly gotten along well with others. Others, of course, being human, but the concept was the same. He didn't like to think about the fact that they rallied for him for reasons past his time as a paladin. Keith was many things, but a leader was not a role he ever thought to fill on the long term. 

 

The Galra, these people, nearly changed that. Nearly. He has other things he needs to do, though, more parts of his life he needs to live. 

 

Three months.

 

They want to give him a crown and a throne. Keith thinks of Zarkon, and then he thinks of Lotor. Then, he thinks of the people he's come to know, _his_ people he's come to love. He thinks of how far they've come in such a short amount of time, and then he thinks of himself. He's only 22; in the face of humanity he's an adult, but he's still young. In the face of the Galra, though, he's still a child even with his mixed heritage. He knows, realistically, that he's got a lot of time left. A lot of time left to learn, really, what being a Galra means. He thinks.

 

He talks to Shiro. It's been three months. 

 

As always, the second the screen connects his breath is taken from him. The sun is setting wherever Shiro is, the soft light filtering in from behind him casting him as the most beautiful thing Keith has ever seen. Shiro and sunsets have always been two of his favorite things. Shiro beams as he greets him, as always, and Keith is never certain if he'll survive each time that smile is directed his way. Even when it's over a datapad, light-years away. 

 

"If I didn't know better, I'd say that wasn't Earth's sun, Shiro." The other man laughs, and Keith's heart swells. He shakes his head, and his smile loses some of it's intensity as he answers.

 

"You're right, Keith," the owner of said name would like to die, "It's Altea's. I got here this morning."

 

"You're early," he replies, and that's it. They fall into conversation, and with each word his resolve strengthens. They talk for two hours, but what, exactly, they talk about doesn't matter. It never has, so long as it's the two of them. It's something that Keith's not quite found with someone else, the ability to talk about nothing and everything until there's no words left to be said, and even then it feels like they could find more. He tells Shiro that there's some things he'd like to talk to him about soon, once he's able to join the rest of the paladins on Altea. Shiro smiles, soft and sure, like he knows exactly what Keith wants to tell him and says there's a few things he'd like to talk to Keith about too. Of course he would know already, he tells himself, because Shiro's always known him better than he knows himself. 

 

They say their goodbyes, promise to see each other soon, and sign off. Keith, feeling lighter than he has in months, goes to speak with his mother. They have work to do, and plans to set in motion. 

 

Three days later, and Keith addresses the planet. Daibazaal wants to give him a crown; he gives them a democracy and takes care to make sure there's no way his name could end up on a ballot (yet, yet, yet). He leads them one final time, together as one, into the dawn of a new era for the Galra people. His speech runs long, he's never been an extremely talkative person but he has a lot he needs to say for them, and a lot he realizes he wants to say as he's speaking. He leaves them to his mother and Kolivan, the echos of their chants keeping his back straight and head tall as he makes his way to Black. 

 

He's late, but not by much. He's led to a beautiful hall overlooking the setting sun, and suddenly he's never felt more at home than he does looking at the group assembled there. They make jokes about him being the next Galra leader, and he catches them up on what's actually going on. He doesn't miss the slightly shocked look Shiro tries to hide when he says he absolutely is _not_ going to be taking any form of crown (he leaves out the yet, not now, later that he'd discussed with Kolivan and his mother). It's easy, after, to get them talking about themselves. He's excited for them all, and happy that they're all doing well. They sit together far past the time the sun sets for good, sharing stories and just existing _together_ in a way that they haven't gotten a chance to do since they lost Allura. He never quite realized how much he missed all of them, before then. His decision feels even more right knowing that he'll be around for more nights like this when they can. 

 

When they part for the night, he learns that his and Shiro's rooms are side by side, and Lance winks at him from behind Shiro's back. Their walk is quiet, but companionable. They part before Keith can work up the nerve to say anything, but he isn't worried. They'll all be on Altea for the weekend, at least. He's got some time, he reminds himself as he changes. He's waited this long to finally talk about it, other things taking priority over his life before now.

 

There's a knock on his door. Maybe he doesn't have to wait. On the other side, Shiro looks sheepish and soft. It makes Keith's heart race, and a smile finds it's way to his face before he thinks to stop it (not that he would). 

 

"Keith," Shiro looks shocked, like he didn't expect the door to open, "I, uh, I hope it's not too late."

 

"Not at all," it's never too late. "What brings you here, Shiro?"

 

Keith steps aside to let him in, and nothing has ever been as endearing as the nervous look on Shiro's face. He should know that he never has to be nervous, not with him. 

 

"Well, there was something I was hoping to talk to you about. If you've got time, right now?"

 

"For you? Always, Shiro." He smiles, small and only a little timid, and looks away before he can see the relief flood over Shiro's face. "I wanted to talk to you, too, so maybe we can hit two birds with one stone here."

 

It only takes a few needling words after that for Keith to get him talking. Then, he realizes quite suddenly that he lied to Shiro. It is too late. It's far, far too late, and the more Shiro talks, the less Keith wants to be in the room with him. There are a lot of things going through his mind as Shiro tells him about Curtis, about a relationship and _marriage_. He has the sinking realization that he has no idea how long they've been together, that he had no idea Shiro had been dating at all, period. Shiro has a lot to say, but Keith can't focus on the words. He's too busy thinking back, trying to remember if there had been any hint in all their conversations, any sign that this was coming. He can't think of any. He hadn't realized that they had drifted so far apart. He thought...he thought-

 

"...and I wanted you to be the first to know," well, yeah, he thought that much at least. A small, angry and decidedly human part of his brain demands to know why it is that he's only finding out after they're _engaged_ if he's the first to know about their relationship. Then, he shoves it away and wonders if he really _is_ the first to know about the relationship. He wonders if Shiro means first person, or first paladin, and if there's a difference there. 

 

"Keith?" He's staring at the ground between them when Shiro calls his attention. The past year has seen him more free with his emotions, but he's scrambling to remember how to lock them back behind closed doors to be dealt with later. A sound makes its way out of his throat, one he hopes sounds more like an acknowledgement than broken sign of a heart collapsing that he knows it is. He can't quite figure out where he got everything so wrong at, what piece of the equation he's missing that ended in Shiro being with someone _else_. "I was, well, I was hoping you would be my best man."

 

He can feel Shiro's gaze heavy on him, but he can't look up. He's afraid that if he does, Shiro will see everything he's trying to hide. There's a bitter voice though that tells him he probably wouldn't, because if Shiro could read him at all then this wouldn't be happening because Shiro would _know_ already how Keith feels, and how this hurts, and he _should_ because Keith _told_ him. He _told him hetoldhimhetoldhimhetoldhim._

 

Maybe he doesn't care. 

 

Shiro calls his name again, and he realizes in an instant how long he's let the silence stretch.

 

"Shit, sorry, um..." he wracks his brain, trying to what he's supposed to respond to. Something about marriage, and Shiro, and someone else, and. Oh. Yeah. Best man. He takes a deep breath, opens his mouth to answer, and then he's jerking up right to the sound of his lion. 

 

Her roar resonates through his body, and his head whips in the direction of the sound. There's a quick moment where he thinks she _knows_ , she's giving him an out, and then he darts toward the door with Shiro following close behind a moment later. Keith doesn't stop running until he sees the other three paladins, lined up in front of their lions. He slows as he approaches, and he only has a moment to wonder what's _actually_ going on before Shiro stops at his side, and then...

 

He feels like the universe is playing a very, very cruel trick on him. 

 

When he makes it back to his room, he contacts Kolivan. He may have given up their crown for something too little, too late, but he didn't give up his _love_ for his people, and there are still an awful lot of Galra, among others, spread throughout the universe who he can help. He asks for immediate assignment, anywhere where he can _help_ still, and requests Axca and her crew be by his side.

 

The next morning, he's stone faced when Shiro breaks the news to the rest of the paladins, and he pretends not to see the sad, confused look Lance tries to send him when Shiro isn't looking. He also pretends not to notice every time Shiro tries to get his answer over being best man. He's lucky, in the end, that he pulls it off. 

 

He stays the weekend, but only because he has no other choice. Not only has he lost Shiro, he's also lost his _fucking lion_ , and no matter how many times he sends back, "Immediate extraction," Kolivan refuses to pull him any earlier than the morning he was already scheduled to leave. Not without more information, and Keith would rather not admit the reason behind his drastically changing plans for the immediate future. In the end, he's still the first to leave. He doesn't say goodbye to the others, he'll send them an apology when he's had time to come up with a believable excuse. 

 

He should be surprised to find his mother on board, but he isn't. When he meets her all-too-knowing eyes, he isn't shocked that she seems to already know what happened. Maybe she does, maybe she saw it in the quantum abyss. That isn't what matters. What matters is that she's his mother, and her arms are open for him before the idea to fall into them even crosses his mind. He lets himself cry, now, not caring that the generals can see as Krolia's arms wrap fiercely around him. As they take him away from Altea, away from Shiro, it occurs to him that _they_ are his family, all four of them. Days pass by, then weeks, and though his heart still aches for Shiro, each time he looks at one of his crew, he knows without a doubt that they, at least, love him _just as fiercely_ as he loves them. 

 

He almost wonders how he could have thought to give them up. Almost, but only when they're around. When he's alone, the unopened messages piling up for him serve as a reminder.

**Author's Note:**

> As always thank you guys for reading. Comments are always appreciated or you can come yell at me on twitter [@astralundertow](http://www.twitter.com/astralundertow)


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